HypnoBirthing is just a method, not a standard of birthing any kind of "right" way. The last birth I attended was a great example of how natural birth can look very different than the movies we watch in class, yet just as triumphant! I met Deena in the first unit of HypnoBirthing for her childbirth class I taught. It was really amazing how obviously instinctual she was and how obviously protective her husband Jason was. It was funny because he didn't even know anything about my class until she said she was going that day. They asked me to be their Doula after her classes were over. At first I was reluctant because she was choosing to birth at Rancho Springs. It is a hospital that does not have the reputation for supporting evidence based birth. I've seen more than my fair share of coercion and manipulation in labor and delivery rooms. I really prefer to make it next to impossible to ever witness more. Not every doula feels that way, but that's were I'm at currently. Nevertheless, being that we'd already had a relationship as teacher and student, and that I knew she was a strong woman - I accepted the honorable invitation to be there. I accepted the fact that even though she really wanted a home birth, but it was just not in the cards this time. We talked at length about how to advocate for the kind of physiological experience she wanted. I went to one doctors appointment with her when she was 40 weeks. She brought an article about delayed cord clamping and her birth plan. I witnessed her going through her birth plan with her doctor. Then I got into a cordial dialogue about optimal cord clamping as the doctor invited my opinions, I was slightly more optimistic about the OB after this exchange. Deena wasn't so hopeful. I wanted to stay open and I hoped that her OB would continue this open dialogue for more compromise. However, she did at one point say to Deena after trying to debate the evidence for leaving a cord in tact until it's done pulsating, "you know you're not the captain of this ship. If anything, you might be an officer, but you have to trust me." Deena and I shook our heads later at how unethical that statement was. I think it solidified Deena's fears that her doctor wasn't really going to honor her Hippocratic oath to provide Deena with informed consent and refusal. It felt like she was insinuating that regardless of evidence, she would be the one making the final decisions. The doctor did invite me to send her an email about evidence for in tact cords. I did so the next day and also asked her to lunch or coffee. I followed up to make sure she got the email too. Yet never any response was received unfortunately. On 1/21 when Deena was 41 weeks and 4 days pregnant, I got a text from that her upper back was hurting. I stopped by quickly to give her some China gel for her back and to talk to her baby girl. I put my head and my hands on her belly and I asked Emery, "hey what are planning on for today?" I felt like Emery said she was just going to hang out with her mom. So I said "Emery! You can hang out with your mom out here! Do you want to do girly things together? You can get your hair done and your nails... and her mom added, "and shopping!" We encouraged Emery to come out and go to Target with us. On 1/22 I got a text from Deena at 5am that said "call me when you wake up, I think I'm in labor." I called her immediately and she answered asking, "what are you doing up so early?" I responded humorously, "why are you in labor so early?" She laughed. It was the beginning of the biggest storm this city has seen in a long time. And it was the beginning of her birth. She said she'd been having far apart surges (contractions) since 11pm and she'd slept maybe an hour or two. I reminded her the importance of sleep and asked her to please make an effort to sleep more. As the story unfolds you'll learn that her decision not to sleep may have been why her birth was so long, but her stubbornness would transfer perfectly into perseverance. I stayed in touch a couple times throughout the day. She still wasn't sleeping so I just waited for her to tell me it was time for me to come. I Arrived at 2:15pm on 1/22 but It was relatively evident that sleep was still a real need. So I tucked her back into bed and left at 3:30pm. She seemed to have at least a decent short nap. That night I was asked to come back again and I arrived at 1:04am on 1/23. Rocko the dog was wearing a bow-tie. Grandma was so helpful and a calming presence for everyone. By 1:58 I recorded that there were still consistent surges since I got there. It was looking more active now. Lots of vocalization. Birth show (bloody show) was visible, but she's very vascular, so that's been going on as expected. It did seem much more active than before. She drank water after every surge. She ate a banana. Her mom, my favorite Grandma of all time for births was making jokes about using the heat pack herself at 2:20am. Deena finished eating a peanut butter and honey toast at 2:53am , she didn't really like eating the last bite. She became a little bit shaky a while before, but deep breaths rid her of the shaking. I was so proud of her for eating and I called her my "best eater yet." Jason jokingly added, "yeah she is." Which gave grandma and I a good laugh. She continued drinking water after every surge so diligently and she used the restroom periodically. 4am she tried the shower. 4:15 out of the shower. Then she was trying to sleep and side lying, but surges started getting more close (guessing 3-5 mins). At 5:25am she got in the bath feeling very worn out. We hoped the bath will either slow it down enough to get better naps, or relax her muscles enough to get her body to open faster. She said the bath made it feel much less intense and she started dozing off in-between her waves.. Thank goodness. Surges spaced from 4 to 5 mins apart. Some closer, but now lasting only 30 seconds instead of 60-90. At 7am she was thinking maybe her water released in tub - but it didn't. She got out of bath. Surges were much stronger now. Deena asked her mom for a cutie (orange) Jason responds, "you got one right here." We put her hair up and dad lint brushed her dress as I mentioned "you have to be sexy to give birth." Jason added, "always sexy for my baby momma" Despite the hopefulness that one nap would do something, I could tell she was still getting worn out. So now it came down to either trying to make baby come out faster or back to the bath for more rest. She described her energy as still there so we tried Deep squats and acupressure. But she was really loosing steam around 8:15am.
Dr.Chris had just adjusted her when I arrived. She went back in the tub again. She said she's visualizing opening up even while resting in the tub. She's was confident it blows my mind. At 3:05pm She said she was so happy she doesn't have to leave home anymore. That no one is going to threaten the bonding moments she gets after birth. I told her, "yes, you're worth it!" She corrected, "no, she's worth it," and rubbed her belly. My eyes watered and I affirmed her already incredible mothering abilities. It seemed like now she could open up in the comfort of her safe place. I began to time some Surges to show to Cristi. They were now 6 1/2 mins apart. Lasting 90 seconds. So good rest could still be had, but when they came - they were strong and hopefully effective. Cristi was on her way back over. Cristi arrived at 3:11pm. She brought the birthing tub. Soon the wonderful team would show up as well. We had a second midwife named Amy and a student midwife named Rachel. All totally genuine, skilled, kind, prepared and good providers. Jason went to the store to get a tarp and an air pump. Cristi set up all her things as I stayed with Deena still in her bath. Deena ate oranges and a honey stick. Her mom made some amazing chicken soup too. Deena felt some rectal pressure 3:25 and I was exited. At 3:43 she said, "Maybe my birth is so long because I'm supposed to inspire other women that they can do it too." I appreciated that, but reminded her that she doesn't have to perform for anyone! At 4:39 the birth tub (which looked more like a pool) was being filled up. I worried I was going to have to cancel my class that night because she seemed complete. Her back up doula was ready but it was a very tricky time! At 4:55pm Cristi said she's 7cm -1 station. Even though she wasn't complete, it really seemed like she was going to have this baby soon since she described more and more pressure. So I texted to tell my students I would be staying. Sure enough, at 6:15pm Cristi checked again and she was about a -1/0 station and she only had a tiny anterior lip of cervix left. I was so glad I postponed my class. The next few hours were a combination of trying to push with no natural expulsive reflux (fetal ejection reflux) and resting to do more of a labor down thing. It was obvious that Deena's uterus had little to no energy left help her with pushing. Grandma put snacks out for everyone, Jason ordered pizza, and I asked my husband to bring us a pot of coffee. I stayed in the bath with her and things were really pretty rough. I regretted not helping her use more of her HypnoBirthing tools to get her in a deeper state sooner. We had her crowning rose picture on the wall and she listed to Deep Theta the whole time, but I really wanted to take her to a better inner-focused place. Everyone left the room for a moment, and I decided what a perfect time to try. I talked her through relaxation and the next surge she had was completely relaxed. I was so glad for her. But then either because we just didn't have enough time or she was getting distracted from people coming back in the room, her surges grew back to taking her over. At 9:15 pm our hero of a Chiropractor Dr. chris came back and adjusted Deena and then the rest of the team too! He joked he was onto us, the real reason we ask him to come to births for our own adjustments. Cristi suggested Deena lie down with Jason and try to sleep. We all hoped that one more nap would get her some kind of natural expulsive reflux so she wouldn't have to be doing all the work herself to push. Alas, we were wrong about the sleep option. That adjustment and getting out of the water was just what her body needed to pick up in consistency of waves. I'm reluctant to say this being that I teach a method of childbirth that promotes the possibilities of comfortable natural birth. But, Deena's next handful of surges were probably full of the most expression of discomfort I've ever seen. And this was my 79th birth. If it was hard to watch for me, I can't imagine how it was for Jason and her mom as well. All of us just wanted to relieve her! At 9:20pm the pizza man came while Deena had a crazy strong surge. Deena was in her room with Jason and I. Deena was LOUD. I mean, the neighbors down the street could have heard her if the window was open. It was the kind of National Geographic, wild animal, crazy thing you hope to avoid in HypnoBirthing. Her body was flaying around. She was groaning with a sort of projection you wouldn't imagine possible in a beautiful feminine woman like herself. The pizza man might have decided not to do deliveries anymore. He arrived hearing all of that and seeing a bunch of women dressed like nurses and a Chiropractor with a table in the living room. Poor pizza man. Anyways, it was time to help Deena more. At 9:51 the midwives asked to release her water and Deena agreed. We then moved her onto pushing on the birth stool. Deena WORKED. Never once did she really get a good reflux. She had to do all of the work to push, and we're talking about at hour 4 of being completely open. Yikes. We all coached her to keep going, keep going, keep going. She would never give up but it was HARD. She almost said, "I can't," but Jason interrupted her and said "don't start." She needed that. It was strong but came with love and trust in her abilities. Baby was at a plus three station at 11pm . How I ironic I thought, were only one hour from the 24th, which is the anniversary of something very special to this family. Deena was only one hour from being 41 weeks and 6 days pregnant, the day her induction was scheduled. Yet, at exactly 11:24pm (there's that 24), Baby Emery arrived with a lot of surprise! After all of that, the last push some how shot her out like a rocket. Her legs flew towards the floor as Cristi gripped her head and shoulders. All of our eyes widened and watered as we listened to Deena speak to her daughter in her arms for the first time. She said "it's okay it's okay" and "Hi baby" "Hi Emery." Emery was so cute and perfect! She only took a short while to work out some fluid, and her cord stayed in tact the whole first hour to get her the extra oxygen she needed. Deena's uterus was pretty much done doing anything. So her bleeding was on the side of too much. A shot of pitocin in the thigh, would be in good order. The Cord was clamped and cut by the new Daddy at 12:20 am. So much for the debate Dr.UnEthical! The Placenta was birthed at about 12:30am, I held Deena up to squat on the bed to push it out. Baby Emery latched approximately at 12:34am. Much to my surprise she did pretty instinctually after such a journey for her. The new parents cuddled each other in their own bed. Completely in charge of their family. After a birth that was beyond challenging, I couldn't think of a better reward. The midwives noticed the coning on Emery's head was slightly crooked. Now it made sense why the Chiropractor helped so much. Whatever was going on internally was keeping Emery from perfectly lining up. Not enough to make it impossible of course, but probably a piece of the challenge. Emery weighed 8lbs and 10oz. She was 21inches long. She looks JUST like her Daddy. And now it's clear to me that she's not just going to like shopping with her mom, she's also going to LOVE being spoiled yet taught to be strong by her Daddy. Emery, Deena, and Jason, you told me months ago that your family legacy was being a hard working family. Now it's clear why. The three of you will NEVER give up on each other. God bless you with fruitfulness for all of your perseverance! And thank you for allowing me to be there with you for your warrior birth.
1 Comment
|
Karen Brann
Birth Doula, Childbirth Educator, Lactation Educator/Counselor Archives
July 2019
Categories |